Odd, you can be doing the most mundane things and it hits you and you realize you knew all along and this is going to sound Sleeping Beautyish… but I felt sorry for her…

Who???

Mother… Freda…

There are a great many of us, who were born self aware and empathic and if you got the whammy of intelligence on top of those things, well, for me it didn’t work out the way life could have… Why???

Because she stole the Joy…

Fredas childhood was like millions of kids during the World Wars and her daddy, my granpa would serve in both those wars and Freda’s mom, well… She couldn’t handle being a mother and dumped the kids at a orphanage and went on to live her life in Denver, Colorado…

That abandonment at such a tender age, it left it’s mark on Freda and she would wear that mark to her grave… but I will give her this… She was the best actress on or off stage… and she pulled that act off most of her life…

She had acquired all she ever wanted, but she was miserably unhappy and like Trump, her hold on all the fingers she had out there unraveled into the mess it is today in court… (really ready for that to be done… PTSD nightmares in overdrive)…

Even from the grave she will still your joy… She put me in the WILL to do exactly what I did and it played out mostly like I expected, the end is near and so is any contact with these people, because family they are not and never have been…

I feel joy most days now, though the depression from the estate mess, it’s working it’s way through… add politics, yea, a little bummed right now…

The joy will be back all the time, the thoughts no other place than here and now and not fearing tomorrow, because she is gone, yet someone is still stealing the joy and that is Trump…

I remember…

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