Did you know that they are studying the “prediction” phase of humans and Freud actually thought it was possible..???

Sigmund Freud did not propose a standalone “predictions theory,” but his psychoanalytic framework closely connects to modern predictive processing in neuroscience, which views the brain as an active “prediction machine” that constantly forecasts sensory inputs to reduce error and maintain psychological equilibrium.

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He wasn’t wrong… I have used this ability since I was a toddler and as I aged, I refined those skills and you could say, that is why the 2 attempts to kill me didn’t work…

I had a reason to fight to live and they had a reason to kill me… I knew that and I have always known that, but this brain fog that lasted over a decade, helped to shield me from those that would put me under 6 feet… My brothers and sisters… Greed was their agenda and revenge…

I am finding a very calming peace entering my world, one that has been missing since I was this little girl, who never did understand why her mother hated her so much, but hate she did and this is what she did to the little girl…

Those are bruises from her forehead to her feet, Freda was ashamed of her kids, because she never told them anything about life and when kids were kids, well, she set out to destroy her oldest son and my sister helped her succeed….

Larry died by suicide in my eyes… He refused cancer treatment back in 2016/17 and decided he was ready to meet his god… Brainwashed from childhood by both parents and abused by his step dad, Larry’s life was never what it should have been, because, he couldn’t let go of his loyalty to Freda and it cost him, me…

Larry died alone in his trailer and was found days after… That’s so typical for those who want control, but don’t know how to use control… His desire to escape the world his mother created was his desire to be with his god…

Only problem, we all, those who believe in science, know there is no magic, no gods, no nothing, but the life we have surrounding us…

We are the gods… but you got psychos like Putin and Trump, so, here we are…

Reason for the write???

Other than dogs barking all night and me and the throne, on first name basis…

I slept good and what I am finding most remarkable, how easy my brain is taking all the revelations this year and most of all???

I AM NOT FIXATING!!!!!!!! yea that’s a big deal….

Mental health, we have gotten there, like I said, still got some areas to refine, but mentally got no complaints…

As for the physical health, that ER visit a couple weeks ago started the process to answer the last injury questions…

I do understand, though the injury to the pancreas and the spleen were 67 years ago, the pancreas has been a ongoing problem since that beating and you take the beating in Texas and Japan all by the time I am 14 years old and skinny, so skinny, Olive Oil would be thick compared to me…

So Yea, repeated blunt force trauma injuries from 5, 8, 13 and the last beating at 14… You betcha, those organs fought for survival and I am still living it….at 72!!!!!

As much as I hated what I went through this year, especially the fight or flight meltdown!!!! I am also grateful, I navigated it to this next phase of the journey….

Once I see this last doctor and get those answers, we know from the CT scan the injuries are there, but the kind and specific’s, we will get from the MRI…

Since figuring this out a few days ago, I started to transition towards a diet for the Pancreas and keeping track of what foods trigger the tight chest pain you would mistake for heart attack!!! (my first one happened in 1974, I ended up in the ER, it was the pancreas, not the heart)….

So no more mongolian dish’s… Fajitas, were a mild reaction, so more veggies and less meat and spaghetti last night with salad and dinner rolls I make… I had no issues, but I also ate a much smaller meal and this morning, I dropped another 2 pounds in 24 hours… Told ya, I can lose 15 pounds in a week, never was hard for me to do, but you miss out on enjoying food too….

I am out of thoughts… Every day I work on the mental health so that as Homer’s dementia progress’s, I am better able to cope with the care giver side of this journey… 32 years of marriage and our lives turned upside down 1 year ago…

Have a wonderful day…

I remember…

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