When granny Cooper died, I was living in Moreno Valley and her death, San Diego, so… I got in my car and went and helped with the funeral and family… Which is very very big…

During all that commotion… My cousin Billy Rae, stated… “Maggi can fall asleep anywhere”…

Now I hadn’t seen my cousin since 1972 and this was 1987 and he knew something about me, that didn’t fit but didn’t it???

When Homer and I met and we went on our honeymoon during the firestorm of 94… I said I would drive some of the way to Reno… Well, hells bells, I was falling asleep within minutes and yep, Homer did all the driving… and it stayed that way, till 2003…

By 2003, Homer was showing signs of issues, and I wasn’t falling asleep every time we got in a vehicle, so what happened???

If you look back at the blog, I stated that I quit all the drugs the military had me on and the Veterans clinic continued me on… those made things in my brain even more fuzzy and fatigued… This would have been 1996… By the time 2003 rolled around, when we moved to Arkansas… My mindset was, I have to be able to drive for our move from Washington to Arkansas, because Homer is driving the Uhaul…

From that point on… The sleepy affect was not as frequent, but, it still happens to this day… Sometimes it’s because of a sugar high drop, and you always want sleep after a sugar high… Sometimes it’s just pure exhaustion and we sit down to take a break and I will take a nap…

By the time the MRI in 2019 was done and the evidence was there for all to see…

Brain bleed(s)…. Stroke!!! My chronic fatigue was answered… It was neurological and I had lived with it since Freda hurt me with a central spinal cord injury before the age of 2…

So my cousin was right… I could fall asleep at the drop of a hat, up till the memory trigger in 2017…

Strokes make you tired and nothing, nothing you do, will take you out of that chronic fatigue that comes with having a stroke…

I look at it this way…

Freda was violent from the very beginning and I always knew about it and stood up to her… But being a child, she used manipulation and coercion to get what she wanted out of any aspect of her life… Because it was never about us kids…

It was always about her….

Helping Homer figure out what drugs he needs to be on for his dementia, help with his pain, keep his heart working and his joints functioning… I have to read loads of medical and psychology… thanks to that… It helped me figure out some of my stuff…

People will ask, did you see a doctor to get your answers…??? I started that journey as soon as I left home and about 10,000 pages of medical documents… I think I covered my ass real well to back up my book… Just saying and the VA, has all those records, plus some the government locked up (my dads military psych records)…

What this all means to me… Fatigue is still there, but the head trauma fog, the fog I have lived with since the first injury before 2 years old…

GONE!!!

I hope permanently…

I am still learning to balance my own body chemistry, since my last blood work after over 20 years, was finally normal… Because the brain was done doing what it had been doing since the first injury before the age of 2…

It’s a journey, I will give it that… It makes me think of things that happened in the past with a different light and I am beginning to understand why Freda was able to be so cold when I told her, her daughter raped my child…

I don’t know if this is coming to a head yet… I feel like the court part of this mess still may have an impact… Every time I think about it, my right eye wants to go straight into a migraine… so I back off… but I remind myself… Because of this court mess… I am paying $550 a year for an umbrella policy to protect us… I hate being insurance poor, but better safe than sorry…

Anymore, my fatigue is from fatigue… I haven’t had brain fog, since Homer and I started sleeping in different rooms last fall… Still having hot flash’s on occasion, oh yea… But the fatigue… It’s strictly from fatigue…

The other thing that keeps me aware, the weakness in my left side… It so feels like I had another stroke in the last 10 years and I only had surgery on Hawaii, but a few months after that surgery, that’s when It hit me… I had a stroke… That was 2017… 2019 would be the MRI and proof, something had happened, but no one could tell me when…

There is a test they can do with a MRI where they go and measure the blood stain in the brain by it’s markers, like Iron… I read the test can cost in excess of $10K… Not something we can afford… But, there is a way for me to find out, if any of those strokes happened on the Air Force’s watch or the VA… Liability and coverup isn’t new… gee look at Trumps crap…

By my guess, I have had 5 brain bleeds… 2 as a child, 3 as an adult and it fits with the memory loss…

Anyway… day is going and heat index is going to be 106 and we want to get the roof on the 5th wheel coated before the next rain arrives this afternoon… Have a wonderful day… I am still working my way through everything and the court crap is actually making me… go figure…

I remember…

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