I see you, but do you really???

Homer and I have been married for 32 years, and up till a couple years ago, I would walk right past Homer in the store and not recognize him… Did that to my son in law, step daughter, you name it… I didn’t recognize the face, even though I have known said face for decades…

I said until a couple years ago… so what’s changed???

ME…

Since the memory trigger on November 5, 2017… My world started unraveling and then it started to click and work together and I didn’t feel so lost and alone in my brain… It was waking up and what was to come for the next 9 years, would be a journey out of darkness and a walk into reality…

When I was on Blue Sky before under Adorablespite, the following grew to over 16,000 people and some imprinted on me, probably about a hundred people… Either their names or their pictures of themselves, left a memory in my brain files…

When I got off Blue Sky in March of this year, I figured, if I go back on, some will follow back, and some will go out of their way to avoid me, because I make them think of things they would just as soon, stay the way they want it, in their brain…

Yesterday, some one liked a post of mine and I commented I recognized their picture… But not the name… No comment back, and at one time that would have been annoying, now, it’s okay, move on, because reality… No one impacts my life, unless I let them into my world and if other’s reject my world, that’s their loss, not mine… Why???

My world does not rely on yours… It relies on me and my choices and my thoughts and my feelings and my desires and not anything or anyone else… That includes Homer…

I come first and foremost in my world… Wasn’t always that way, but it is from now on…

I will never remember all the names or faces of those I meet or converse with in life… I also won’t intrude into your space if your platform is one that you are promoting… (So many used mine last time to promote themselves and left me in the dust, that does get old after a while, the narcissists on this planet..)

We have lived next door to our neighbors for 2 years now and if we ran into them in the store, Homer would recognize them in a heartbeat, me, I would walk right past them… That’s not going to change any time soon…

Okay enough with my lousy memory on faces and names…

Yesterday, I didn’t have any sugar after 3pm and we had a healthy dinner and how many times did I get out of bed last night???

1 time less than the night before…

Woke this morning with no gut pain, upper or lower and the body functioning normally… I think I have stumbled upon my culprit…

SUGAR….

If that’s what has been the issue with the pancreas, I doubt it’s the only one… but it wouldn’t surprise me if it is… Going without a munch after dinner, even sugarless hard candy or any munch… Will be an adjustment… But…

If I wake up and don’t get woke up by internal pain, then, I am on the right trail for the digestive trigger’s… and by the time I get an appointment with a gastro doctor, I may have figured out why my pancreas was so unhappy since the beating at 5 years old… 67 years, that didn’t take me too long to figure out!!!

Other than a few trips for the bladder last night, I woke feeling okay and not in lots of pain, which in it’s self is new…

Have a wonderful day, I am still experimenting with the digestive health and finding a balance I have never known, since I was a little girl, before they beat me to death…

I remember…

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