Homer will be the first to tell you…

If Maggi knows why she has pain, she has no problem managing it without becoming a addict to pain killers… or booze or pot or anything…

When I wrote the blog back in 17 and I have 4 or 5 years of writing on backup… I wrote about what I thought was wrong with my body and most of it I got right…

I didn’t know what the names of some of the junk I live with… Yet, after the memory trigger via the Sutherland Springs, Texas massacre… I asked for tests…

I had already been through many tests over the decades and 75% gave the wrong diagnosis… They wanted to do a spinal tap and I never allowed one…

I knew, I wasn’t fighting a disease, I was fighting my injuries… and not being a doctor, I didn’t understand why my body sold me out on more than one occasion… Like at Basic Training… (see early blog)…

I learned about the adhesions when I got pregnant, I learned about the injuries to my bone, but no one could explain those, and we know Freda lied and it was blunt force trauma fractures causing my bone to be in constant healing mode into my 30’s… That’s when they did the last nuclear bone scan and it still showed hot areas… Thus the Paget’s misdiagnosis…

I learned about the IBS while active duty and I learned about the stuff with my eye and I learned I had depression with no reason that I knew of to have depression…

Then that memory trigger and we get a brain MRI and there are those injuries… Then they test my arms back in 04 and we knew then of nerve damage, but they knew that in the military, but not the why….

Over the last 50 years… Since I went in the Air Force in 77… I asked questions and I asked questions before the military and no one could answer them and the only reason they couldn’t????

I “Didn’t Remember the abuse”…. That simple…

I knew but I didn’t, because some where along the way between the last blow to my head and my first pregnancy… Something happened to take those memories away… From 17 years old on, I didn’t remember…

That’s all changed… Seeing the oral surgeon, a specialist in reconstructive surgery, the first one I have ever seen… Was the final answer to my pain and issues and at least… Now I know what and why… It all started before I ever made it to my teen years… Freda loved hitting my face and head… Staggering how cruel she was and no tears will ever be shed…

I am a happy camper… I know why every frigging issue I have is, why I have it and who gave it to me… So thank you Don and Freda Bagwell for a lifetime of buckets of shit and I still came out smelling like a rose…

Have a wonderful evening, we are now under Hurricane watch and that means the computers say it’s coming our direction… We are only a hour from Alabama on the coast… Thank you for reading and if you know anyone on this planet who has lived with amnesia for 5+ decades… send them my way… Kindred souls are always welcomed….

I remember…

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