My brain is hungry for more… I know, I know something pivotal happened in those years I don’t remember…and it’s driving me crazy with non stop thoughts and making my neck hurt and giving me a headache…. I can see it, but can’t grasp it!!!! UGH!!!!!

When I told her I wanted to buy a big house and have everyone over, to help out, you would have thought I was Judas and it was very obvious, she wanted to make sure that didn’t happen, but she had no problem taking property for her granddaughter or daughter in law to help them out when I offered…

So we bought a old farm house an flipped it…

Still, why did she do it…

2010, our last trip to that small town to pick up stuff out of storage and I tell her what happened in her house and my best description would be Charles Manson staring back at me, no emotion, stone cold and not a flicker of life… I knew, I remembered and then a year later the surgery at the El Paso VA!!!

Still, Why did she do it???

Up till the last time I saw her, she swore who her children’s fathers were and one, was a lie and that lie is the one with the mental health degree, who knew our mother suffered from mental illness…

Still, Why did she do it???

This inheritance money, is play money to me in my situation… Homer pass’s away, I am secure with my own income…. I didn’t need or want Freda’s money, I obtained financial independence in 98…. She died in 25….

Still, Why did she do it???

She lied about her son, she lied about her children, she lied about her god…

Still, Why did she do it???

I struggle with all this, because this is not the way I live my life, taking from others, lying or stealing or cheating or raping or murdering… I experienced all that under her roof, except I wasn’t raped, my child was…

Still, Why did she do it???

I don’t need to work on a statement for the court… All I have to do is tell the court my mother had a documented mental illness, that every member of the family knew about and that is why they robbed her blind and abused her…

That is the results of why she did it….

I remember…

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