IF you ever had a stroke, you’ll know exactly where I am coming from and if you got medical help… Well I never have, not once…

The MRI shows that I had at least one brain bleed… We don’t know for sure how many I have had, because without doing a test where they measure the date of the mineral deposit on the brain from the bleed and I ain’t got $10K+ for that kind of MRI test and specialized radiologist…

So my only alternative is to go back and see when I am missing memory and this is where the Hawaii neuro guy and I disagree, to a point… I say I have photographic memory and he thinks I may make memories different from everyone else… So, who’s right???

Both of us are… I still have the ability and it’s not in line with anything documented, but it does show I make memories different from the norm… That being said, why the write???

My short term memory is beyond awful… I have notepads and lots of notes… Don’t go shopping without one… but because I know I have had more than one stroke, because of my physical weakness changed each time and the one thing that is getting worse…

My left side and the bleed and TBI are on the right side of the brain…

When the PT kids tested me, it showed my left side was weaker than my right and I know for a fact, in testing before the 2011 operation at the El Paso VA… I had no significant weakness that was noticeable upon testing…

Now… I struggle to make the left hand scratch the puppies or get it to work in unison with my right…

As I wrote before… I think I have had 4 possibly 5 bleeds on the brain and that is why my left side is still so much weaker and hasn’t gotten better, no matter how much I exercise it… and I think, “STROKE”…

Yea, I gotta back up on that thought and go with something else… Neuropathy and I am betting, my weakness is not muscle related, but nerve related… Which is in keeping with the test results from Wenatchee, when he tested my arms and found I had neuropathy and muscle damage in my right arm…

So between that knowledge, the testing they did on my legs and arms on Hawaii… I am going to lean towards the stenosis may be getting worse or my exercising is changing the way things are twisted or inflamed… All I know… Left isn’t what it should be and may never be and will anyone do any more testing.???

Only if I complain I am having issues and they will send me for tests, just to tell me I have muscle damage and nerve damage and here’s some drugs or physical therapy…

I can only afford to use my medicare so much and my eyes, they will costs me 4 figures… So, no referrals, no PT… Just keep doing what I am doing and those areas that aren’t damaged for ever… well make them stronger to compensate, so that I can continue to be independent… The joy of Domestic violence… (I shed no tears for those deaths, read the blog)…

Strokes are a very frustrating thing to live with, especially if you never got care, until decades later… but at least, I know what I am living with…

I remember..

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