I told my sister Peggy about 10 years or so ago…

“It wouldn’t be over till she was dead, Freda (mom)”… and you know what…???

I was right…

I could see the mental health side of this decades ago and I knew who the master of the whole mess was and then I go have surgery at El Paso VA and they nearly do me under and screw up my neck, which the MRI shows how bad that was and they mess up my healing brain and I am set back decades on remembering… Just wow, truly I am shaking my head in how fucked up the VA health care system is…

Anyway…

Now that Freda’s estate mess is done and statue of limitatins kicks in… What I do next??? Your guess is as good as mine…

I have a 3 year subscription to this site, I pay nothing for Blue Sky and I am really kind of getting fed up with fake people on Blue Sky, truly, social media is a pestulence unlike anything else, except for the Spanish Inquisition… I think that social media is in keeping with that time period…

But, back to is it over… and in all honesty, going by what I know of psychology and how my own mental health journey has come full circle, I am thinking yea, it’s over… and because of that, the only thing left to do is write the damn book and I am more terrified of doing that, than I am in kicking my siblings ass’s… Just fantaszing here, but you get my drift…

Homer is allowing me time in my room and he is keeping the pups quiet so that my train of thought doesn’t take off without me, but still, just writing a couple of pages for the book took me forever and I wasn’t happy with it… so what do I do???

Start publishing the story online so someone can steal my work or wait and watch and see if humanity wakes up and women are just as equal as the dirt you walk on???

Yea, it feels like we are living an illusion and the only way to break free, kill the illusion and that’s the internet…

AI may do that for us, just before it kills us off by destroying our infrastructure and our food system, oh wait, the republicans did that already, so what’s left for AI to destroy???

The world…

Yea I am really at a juncture and trying to figure it out, it will come to me in time…

My body is just now adjusting to a normal sleep pattern, one that was screwed up for decades and my brain is adjusting to the checkmate against the family…

If I write the story, all the addictions, be it drugs or sex will come out… and that’s a massive family of sickness… I will never take my maiden name back…

Thats all I got, no complaints, dealing with the mental health side, progressing out of darkness and getting to that point in my reality that those first 14 years of Freda memories, well, I may have to accept the neurologist was right… I may never be free of….

Amnesia….

I remember…

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