When Relationships become a Chore….

Off on one of my brain candy thoughts and I got to thinking, why do some relationships become a chore, to much hassle, non workable??? What happens to change the dynamics of relationships to make them into a chore, an for some, it’s an out right burden, because of the personality they have…

I can remember a moment in time, that once we made the effort to be self sustaining… we wouldn’t let anyone else pay our way or help… I just realized, that’s when we both decided it was time to become adults an own our lives an not let others influence in any way, not by money and not by emotional attachments… not by inclusion…

I tried, in one of those moments in time… I used my ability an communicated the warning signs and asked for help, something I hadn’t done in this relationship, I knew the personality and got the response I expected… not now, not ever, getting involved… and I stepped back an said, okay, the relationship is not what I thought, it’s about control….

So I let the person have control in respect to the subject matter…. and a few years later, it would cost me several thousand dollars an I had expected it, because of what hubby had told me… he is not a talker, poor dude, I am…

And I absorbed that loss and moved on an kept up what I knew wasn’t a real relationship, but out of respect for the man that called me daughter, we would do what is right, since we weren’t obligated or christians… we did it out of love for him……

Fast forward a few years an the relationship is wearing, not only on me, but hubby, because when I asked for help and interference and got denied… A few years later, We were to have empathy towards one of the people that costs us and she was interfering where she thought appropriate… christian behavior to the core and not any mental health thinking in any form…

She forgave them for what they did to us, so we were suppose to jump on board an be at that same train station of head fake religion and emotions…

Yep, we stuck to our morals, our ethics, our desire, as to when to let that person back into our lives and truly, I was trying long before the other person interfered… through his kid and him an got no place… It’s their blood and it’s their choices… just like it is with my blood an my choices…

So morale of story… If you know the relationship is fake, don’t keep it up… our granddaughter decided ours was an divorced us… a choice, she will have to live with the rest of her life… an no, she isn’t either of our blood, but she was still one of ours… a relationship, we were willing to work on…

The other relationship, not so much, after the interference early this year….

We grew, we choose, who we let in our worlds, not the other way around…

If we open the door and let you in, and you chose to decline, that is your choice… just don’t expect the door to be opened again… that is our choice…

Relationships are hard and for the longest time I was beating myself up over my sons… an when the memory came back when they started the disrespect an abuse… that guilt melted away… I gave them life, that doesn’t give them a right to abuse and they started early… I’m just putting a stop to it…

No, relationships are never easy, be it parent, spouse, child, friend… If they destroy the trust and emotional attachment… we just don’t seem to have much need to fix, what they broke to begin with…

We don’t live by man’s gods in our home…

We live by humanity’s reality that life comes from the mother and the father earth takes it back… no lights, no parades, no warm fuzzy feelings… you just go back to what you were to begin with….

Star dust…. we are a planet you know….

Adorable Spite… on a quest….

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