No Longer Treading Water….

Our favorite bad boys just went by, could hear them a half a mile away an could hear them a mile away after they passed, siren was on that long… aloha, just a marketing ploy to get your dollars, make sure it’s worth it… I’ve lived here going on 5 years and we really wasted our money… an we may not be moving for a very long time… so, maybe a louder siren…. clean the hood up and make it a nice place to live… lol, not sure I got that kind of patience, but covid has all the say, so, it may not matter one way or the other….

I wrote several months back that things were changing… and they have been… as the stenosis is brought under control, an I haven’t had a fog day in a week, so, that’s a step in the right direction….

Physical therapy and me getting off my flat ass and exercising, seem to be the key to what I want… a better quality of life…

As for my birthday, I wasn’t surprised and that fake relationships have boundaries too…. hubby said, last night, he didn’t look for property back home… he was looking someplace else and I never said a word about my birth day…. he’s a keeper….

No if you want to be a part of someones life, you work at it… you know as much information as they give you… which is limited, we aren’t on FB, so we don’t know anniversary dates or partner’s birthdays or much of anything else… because we aren’t considered family…. and we accept that…

Totally…. accepted and trying, just doesn’t seem to be what we should bother doing anymore and just get on with our lives, because we seem to be more of a nuisance than we are mom & dad, grandma & granpa or brother or sister or son or daughter… so, we aren’t treading water anymore on trying to participate and for us disabled… of body, it’s no longer worth it….

We did what we could to support those, during this time of chaos… but that credit card has been retired and now, it’s solely about what we need…. because in the end… the only ones that have our backs is our selves…

Told hubby, I needed to get a new lawyer program an work on our Wills… what we have in the strongbox now, just won’t work… and he knows this… so, another project for me to tackle…..

Hubby warned me, my dream wasn’t a reality and I still had to dream… just like my birth family, I let those illusions go, because mental illness is that pervasive in the family… I have to let the illusions I had of home, go too…

Like Trump said with 155,000+ deaths on his hands…..

It is what it is and their choices, helped to make ours… just that simple…

You have to admit… I did warn you…. All of you….

Mom, Sister, Daughter, Grandma, I know my friends…

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