Repressed memories, amnesia, psychological trauma…. severe closed head brain injury….. and the journey continues….
A memory that has been bugging me, since my dental work failed, or, the dental work I paid for, that the VA let fail…. and that memory is dental related, all the way back to 1971….
From 18 years old to birth… I have big gaps of memory, well that’s not right… I have specific memory gaps…. the last blow to the head……
Was the last time Don hit me upside the head… summer of 71 on Okinawa…..
Now I’ve been trying to remember what that surgeon on Okinawa told me about my teeth and what he recommended, after removing 3 teeth from my upper palete, they grew in sideways, instead of erupting out the gums… they grew across the roof of my mouth under the tissue…
Anyway, he said something that I’ve been trying to pin down and I still can’t, but I think, always a dangerous thing to do, but I think….. he said I had short root structure and it was either from genetics or trauma and I had no memory of the traumas…. so I put it on genetics…. guess what????
I was wrong…. It was a result from trauma… my head and face were Freda’s favorite targets…. christians, no excuse for them and not a deep enough hell to put them in….
When the surgeon on the Kona side did those 4 extractions (these were bridges that housed 9 teeth) so those natural teeth were destroyed by the leaking bridges… when he extracted them, they had short roots…. an the light bulb went off this morning or Eureka….
Freda told a story, I won’t waste time with here about here own teeth… but after I caught her in so many lies when we lived in town from 2003 to 2010… those stories she told me, turned out to be lies… why??? Becuase she didn’t remember her own lies…
Remember, I have that quirky Sheldon Cooper memory ability, one that is coming back to fast for me… it’s annoying to remember every little thing… it gets crowded up in those grey cells….
So, trauma….. my mouth also shows trauma from Don & Freda beating on a little child… I wonder….
Did it make them feel big and important as they beat on that 5, 8, 13, 14 year old little girl??? Did it make them feel powerful the way Trump and Kavanaugh do for getting away with rape???? Does It???????
I find it weird how this memory recovery is and how right that neurologist was about my memories coming back….
Some of this is beyond uncomfortable… but if I had gone through this part of the process last year… not sure I would have pursued it… this part of the process is bringing up the ugly part of the Don & Freda nightmare…..
The Covid19 is bringing up other memories that have to do with my adult life… and again, the memories I am missing here are related to a past marriage and the health care scares the Air Force put me through….
I’m getting there… every day, new…. okay not new, but the past waltz’s in before my eyes…..
I’ll be honest, I hate this memory ability and always have hated it…. it can replay a memory over and over till you are ready to go jump off that cliff…. but things have changed and I think, that is because…..
I am remembering…..
We are ready for the virus if it shows up here… being an island, it will spread fast and hard…. lots of obese peeps here, so diabetes and poor health, it could hit us hard… but we are ready for a month long if not longer stay on our property…. that acre just became very comfortable….
Went out an checked out our growing pineapple, we now have 8 producing plants of the white pineapple… and about 20 baby plants growing and will get a bunch more baby plants off the ones producing…. looks like I’m freezing a lot of pineapple… it’s the best meat tenderizer…. so don’t eat to much, it will tenderize the inside of your mouth…. true story….
Have a great day, an get ready for the virus, not a matter of if, it’s when will it hit your area and the government already proved incompetence… don’t become one of their statistics… get ready with a 2 week supply of food and necessary….
Sgt. USAF DAV I remember… Margie….