PTSD Nightmares… still….

One thing about psychology… sometimes it gets it right with the PTSD stuff, not always, with my case… 50+ years of amnesia… isn’t the norm, according to what I have been able to find out there in papers on the subject….

The nightmares are happening, but not like before… they don’t scare me, they just annoy me, for waking me up… so now I have to train myself to acknowledge this kind of memory, so that it can open all the way….

Like I said before, at one time, I could remember every moment that passed by… which is why Freda nicknamed me, “tattle tell”… she even called me that in 2005… at the Mena hospital…. which was another trigger to remembering Margie’s death…. the woman herself, helped me remember, just by making comments, she made, when I was a child… you just can’t fix stupid, when it comes to christians and lies… they always trip themselves up… always….

The nightmares are not anymore intrusive, than having to get up an pee, as ole folks do at night… again it centers around Big Springs, Texas and when Margie died…. to me, it seems like the barriers that were up, are starting to crumble….

Taking the move out of the picture until we know what the VA is doing, helped… it took a distraction and filed it… leaving the mind free to do what it does, when you are me…. have fun….

Blood work was screwed up, so I did, get into the candy corn after midnight… so test redo and quick checkup sometime in Dec… right now… get done with the last eye post op and find out whats next for my screwy vision and get a denture, so my diet can get back to normal, but doubt it… it hurts to use the denture I have now, doubt the tissue is going to be any happier with a new full denture… neuropathy is taking it’s toll, thus the implants… no pressure on the tissue… year and a half of this non stop pain daily, from dental… 9 years of issues as it is… so over VA death care….

Wet, grey kind of day… saw lots of rigs headed up the mountain for the weekend camp out… the damage is growing from the ignorance of superstitions… but, hey, it’s their battle, their choice… we just don’t support them…. nor do a lot of people here… but you don’t hear about that…

All box’s been thru, except one, and I need the extra cabinet to unpack those kitchen items…. so we are as organized as we can get in a 1,000 sq feet and just about every inch is being used…. going to be fun, when we finish the floors…

Sad what Trump and his christian base have done to the Kurds… read the history of us sending Jews back to be murdered… blood on America’s hands… not just Trumps… all of us…. Trump did one thing, he made America the greatest country to look like a complete and total failure to humanity….

Sgt. USAF DAV I Remember… Margie….

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